Politics

Donald Trump Cannot Set His Twitter Cover Photo To KFC Meal, Federal Judge Rules

A tough break for the president.

NEW YORK, NY - In what is sure to be a blow to President Trump’s Twitter usage, a New York federal judge has ruled that he may not set his cover photo to an image of a KFC bucket meal, despite his best efforts.

The judge confirmed that the move would violate the little known twenty-eighth amendment, which states that “KFC isn’t even that great, so why would you want to let people know that you eat there? Just don’t do it, okay?”.

Trump is expected to appeal the ruling, claiming that the judge was discriminating against a Civil War hero, KFC founder Colonel Harland Sanders.



White House spokeswoman Sarah Huckabee Sanders, who traces her ancestry all the way to a raccoon gangbang behind a Hope, AR in late 1981, complained about an activist judge who probably wasn’t even born in the South.

“Ya’ll, this is more government overreach by a judge who clearly doesn’t understand the 1st Amendment. A president is allowed to upload any image he wants to his Twitter account, no matter how sub-par the food he loves is.”

The press briefing was cut short as the Secret Service once again caught Melania Trump trying to emerge from another sinkhole on the White House lawn.

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Guybrush Threepwood

Hi, I'm Guybrush. Not Gorbush, not Frygosh, not Monsieur Tweephood, and certainly not Mr. Spicecake. Guybrush. I used to desperately want to be a pirate, however after many fruitless endeavors and being involved in a number of monkey-related incidents and quarrels with a chap named LeChuck, I turned my attentions to my second love - journalism. I'm here to bring you the latest news from here, there and everywhere. I'll sleep when I'm dead. Or later tonight.

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